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July | 2014 | Walls Turned Sideways

https://socialdeterminants.wordpress.com/2014/07

July 11, 2014. Mdash; Leave a comment. Some quotes have been popping up in multiple places for me recently. This one had struck me earlier this week, then was repeated in class by one of my teachers, Kerri Kelly:. For a seed to achieve its greatest expression, it must come completely undone. The shell cracks, its insides come out and everything changes. To someone who doesn’t understand growth, it would look like complete destruction. — Cynthia Occelli. Then this week in an article in Elephant Journal:.

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July | 2015 | Walls Turned Sideways

https://socialdeterminants.wordpress.com/2015/07

July 7, 2015. Mdash; Leave a comment. Everyone had a story about the first time they noticed the pelicans. For me, the day the pelicans arrived was notable only in its aggressive featurelessness, the sky welded to the chill gray waters of the bay. The low clouds muted the rumble of truck tires over train tracks. The light was diffuse, the street resonating with the air of a factory before the first shift. That is to say, there was nothing to distract from the birds. Soon it was hard to imagine the slough...

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February | 2015 | Walls Turned Sideways

https://socialdeterminants.wordpress.com/2015/02

February 5, 2015. Mdash; Leave a comment. I’ve always been someone who has found my identity through my work. But for anyone who identifies really strongly with any one part of their life (a passion, basically), being dissatisfied with that one thing can be pretty crushing. It becomes hard to get away from the idea that the next thing will be The One Thing That Changes All of the Things I Don’t Like In My Life. Kids are so great to be around. They have an openness and honesty that is really pure....

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April | 2014 | Walls Turned Sideways

https://socialdeterminants.wordpress.com/2014/04

April 26, 2014. Mdash; Leave a comment. In the weird world of politics and relationships where I work, caught up in the intimate stories behind the local news, we have all cringed at the thought of another community meeting, another gathering of the local service providers. THAT GUY will be there. I do not want to listen to that same speech of his AGAIN. I’ve become a big fan of Pema Chodron’s writing in the past few months. She talks a lot about. I am such a failure. It manifests in the same way, gettin...

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Transitions | Walls Turned Sideways

https://socialdeterminants.wordpress.com/2015/02/05/transitioning

February 5, 2015. Mdash; Leave a comment. I’ve always been someone who has found my identity through my work. But for anyone who identifies really strongly with any one part of their life (a passion, basically), being dissatisfied with that one thing can be pretty crushing. It becomes hard to get away from the idea that the next thing will be The One Thing That Changes All of the Things I Don’t Like In My Life. Kids are so great to be around. They have an openness and honesty that is really pure....You a...

socialdeterminants.wordpress.com

September | 2014 | Walls Turned Sideways

https://socialdeterminants.wordpress.com/2014/09

September 17, 2014. Mdash; Leave a comment. Life update: I held my first handstand this morning. There were times before today when I had almost just about gotten there, felt my center shifting before feeling the tiniest twinge of panic and yanking myself back to the ground. Last week I got into. Forearm stand. When I told some yoga pals about this they raised their eyebrows. “You know that’s harder than handstand, right? 8220;But the base is steadier with. 8221; I replied. September 14, 2014. Blog at Wo...

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March | 2014 | Walls Turned Sideways

https://socialdeterminants.wordpress.com/2014/03

By way of explanation. March 30, 2014. Mdash; 2 Comments. I went out to a party alone last night. A party where I only knew the person hosting it. I had conversations with people who I’d never met before. They were very pleasant and I felt at ease. This all feels so monumental. I have come so far since I was raped on July 15, 2012. It’s not as bad as it was. I used to come home from work unraveled, incapable of talking to anyone until I laid in bed in a tiny ball for half an hour. I didn&#8...And the pat...

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May | 2014 | Walls Turned Sideways

https://socialdeterminants.wordpress.com/2014/05

May 19, 2014. Mdash; Leave a comment. Eye contact with any stranger can be terrifying. I play chicken, seeing who will look away first. Sometimes the other person will look away as soon as my eyes drift towards theirs. Some will smile and say hi. Why is this so scary? May 7, 2014. Mdash; Leave a comment. There is just so much more ease in the present. These transitional times are the worst. Knowing that you are leaving some part of yourself behind. Not quite able to occupy the new space yet. ...I crashed...

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June | 2014 | Walls Turned Sideways

https://socialdeterminants.wordpress.com/2014/06

June 30, 2014. Mdash; Leave a comment. This week marked the end of my yoga teacher training. I came in longing for structure in my life, seeking a community of what I hoped would be like minded people, and hoping to dive a little deeper into my yoga practice. I did a lot of hand-waving about whether or not I wanted to teach at the end, and I’m excited to continue learning. In two days I move out of my apartment and into a new life, untethered from the relationship that defined my entire adulthood. I reme...